Personally and for my money I think our team photos in the past have focussed too much on focussing on the players. Look at the grain on that nice old bench. There is action there too you know. Not just in the faces of men!
MATCH REPORT 070208
2-2 – Thursday Knights – MacRob
TW 1, CB 1, DC, JH, RH, CG, AW, TH (coach)
MOM CG
THAT WAS A TIGHT ONE!!!!!!!!!!!
AND MY KNEE REALLY HURTS AGAIN!!
The Nannas gave new definition to the word “brave” last night. Obviously out classed and out aged the weary brown men stood as tall as their spines would allow.
The match started with one of them RIPPING a hell toe poke into the top right corner, this was followed by another great goal across the face. We started to look at each other with “that look” in our eyes….It wasn’t until the coach Tommy came running onto the court and turkey slapped each one of us. AWAKE he yelled….From there we got one cheaky one back before half time.
The second half belonged to old ladies in cardigans. We had that many shots that rebounded of the bars and it was only a question of time before we struck again. We did and yet they continued to press. It must have been a warm night because a few nannas we a touch slow to double back and “get in D”…We go there with a second to spare as they made one last flurry.
The only interesting point to come of this match report is the precedent that will be set. I believe there is a missing match report – surely there has to be reprisals. Comments please…
Still the nannas for this season remain – UNDEFEATED!!!!
How to get under the opposition’s skin
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
When Nannas Dance
Sometimes schoolchildren write to me and they say: ‘The nannas are obviously a bunch of superfit guys who can play soccer really well, but what do they get up to when they aren’t carving shit up on the soccer field?”
I will tell you what we do. We dance. See:
But sometimes just dancing isn’t enough. You have to take your pants off and dance. Like this:
I hope this answers the questions of the little children.
The lost pics
Here are some pics from the final at the end of 2006. Sorry but don’t know how to put in right order and sorry I haven’t got to them until now.
Peace and Fucking,
Tao
For little Danny
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers.
For he today who sheds his blood with little Danny shall be his brother.
Be he ne’er so vile, this day shall gentle his condition, and gentlemen now abed shall think themselves acursed they were not here, and hold their manhoods cheap whilst any speaks, that fought with us upon APISC’s courts.
Match Report 250107
vs Jossies Giants 8-2
CB 2, DC 2, TW 2, JH 2, CG, TH (coach)
MOM CB
Are these guys not being fed or what? A hungry fiver of hardened nan-power stepped onto the court at the pits last night for a ravenous display of classic Nanna football glory.
Although the writer acknowledges the objective and inalienable truth of his being voted MOM this week, he cannot help but borrow the comment that it was the team that was the winner.
The eight goals we scored were divided evenly among the on-field players with everyone taking two each.
There was a lot of good passing. Jim was blisteringly on target. Cocky was all over it up front and pulling off some of his lovely trademark turns. Taozza was winning every fiftyfifty challenge and the writer ran quite a bit and nailed home an obligue angle shot at maximum velocity. Gillla continued to astound the opposition with stopping the unstoppable shots.
Tommy was solid on the touchline with a one-legged tripod and rousing advice and encouragement.
A great victory. Nannas undefeated in the top division.
Nan Love Jan 25, 2007 Match
Keep It Leftly 20070125
The words of a romantic warrior
Remember that the opposition, whom we shall have the honor to destroy, are good players and stark competitors. To beat such men, you must not despise their ability, but you must be confident in your own superiority.
MATCH REPORT 180107
NANNAS VERUS harcourt
nannas 4 harcourt 0
Playing: RH(c), DC, CB, CG, TK, AW, JH
Goals: CB 2, TK 1, CG 1
MOM: CG
The first game of a new year Nanna’s, and what a game it was!!! Extreme brown pride should be felt, like you were dancing with GG Allen!!
We faced up to Harcourt with captain muttering watch out for number 6 – “he’s the man, he’s the man!!” So we were ready, on our game – focused. It was TIGHT the whole time.
Chris Brown scored twice with Kondo and ME dobbing one each. They tried to score but forgot what hardess was andsoftly peppered away.
The real controversy occured after the game with two UNNAMMED nannas stepping outside from the pub for a cigarrette!!! WHAT WAS THIS!!! Putting our whole smoke free sponsor ship at risk.
Luckily Jim offered to buy a vapouriser for the next card frenzy, however, Chris Brown is yet to attone.
It would be remiss of me not to mention Tao’s bux night. There were plenty of Bruises on show, and I presume that is why Tao could not make it – because of a whopper!
HOLD YOUR HEADS HIGH NANNAS, A GREAT START TO THE YEAR!!!!!!!!
A TRIBUTE TO JAMES BROWN – the funkiest nanna
What the world would have been like had he never have been born is unimaginable. It would be hard to argue that any other individual has had as much influence on music as this man. I won’t name his innovations here as they are so ever-present and deeply engrained in all of us that to describe them would be as pointless as notating the rhythms of our hearts and lungs.
I don’t feel it is appropriate to speak of loss in this situation. When a man dies who has contributed so much to music, more notably Soul Music, and more personally has inspired and architected my own very livelihood, I think speaking of loss would be ungrateful. Let us rather give thanks for what he gave us; for every every drop of his sweat that, along with his moans and grunts, bathed the stages and phonographs of our world in sweet raw Soul. Let us get up and celebrate his life with our music, and ours with his, just like he showed us.
May his soul rest in peace, but let his spirit keep working tirelessly among us.”
A Nanna’s prayer
God our father, who has led us on to victory, please continue Your inspiring guidance in this the greatest of our contests.
Strengthen my soul so that the weakening instinct of self-preservation, which besets us all on the paddock, shall not blind me to my duty, to my own manhood, to the glory of my calling, and to the responsibility to my fellow Nannas.
Grant to our team that disciplined valor and mutual confidence which insures success.
Let me not mourn for the men that sustain injuries, but rather let me be glad that such hereos have played.
If it be my lot to fall, let me do so with courage and honour in a manner which which will bring the greatest harm to the opposition.
Give us the victory, Lord.
070111
following the 3rd forfiet in a row the nannas were reduced to playing a mixed team (and hinkley). kudos to hugh for supporting and photography….
Build true Nannas
Build me a Nanna, O Lord, who will be strong enough to know when he is weak, and brave enough to face himself when he is afraid, one who will be proud and unbending in honest defeat, and humble and gentle in victory.
team photo updates
ok fools, after toms yelling i have put up the 4 most recent team phots that i have (have a look in the team photo category) i also did some cleaning up after you bums who can’t use computers… who has the finals shot ? chip ?
Jose’s words will do us the world of good- even if it’s hard to know what he’s on about
If you can play great music then you play great music, but if you cannot then at least play something
061214 Finals action between Nannas and Hyderoos
Playing: CB, CG, JH, AW, TW
Boundary riders: TH, DC
Goals: JH2, CG1, TW1
MOM:JH
There are sometimes in sport, when competition takes on a life of its own and the protagonists are swept along on a trajectory all their own. So it was last night as a very special, tight five, Nanna outfit brushed aside an insipid opponent with little trouble. Almost from the first whistle a well defined Nanna shape developed, with as many as three brown men behind the ball at any one time, with the occasional surge as men in defence pushed upfield to take the game in new directions. Although there were hints of the usual Nanna game of over-excitement and a one-touch too many, there was also an overriding poise, or grace, to the Nannas, which effectively subdued the opposition and took them out of the game. It was if the Browns knew the opposition was not up to snuff if there was on display true Nanna respect. Indeed, a special Nannerian performance was afoot, and once the first goal went in this feeling only grew.
And what a goal it was. Gill, in the first minutes of play, took a range finder to the opposing goalie’s net, thinking, “yeah, better just loosen up the arm, get my bearings”. Well, the throw was on target and much to his team’s chagrin, Gill’s opposite number tried an ill-advised catch. The ball went straight through his fingers and the net shivered like a virgin, touched for the very first time. Like an idiot the blue keeper looked at the ref hoping some ancient, little known by-law of the world game might save him. But alas the ref pointed to the middle of the court and said, “try again boys”. One nil.
The second goal was somewhat more conventional but no less of a kick in the nuts to the opposition. After some highly competent defence and counter attacking, the Nans had a kick-in deep in enemy territory. Tao, sensing an opportunity was ripe, lay off a sensitive little pass with the outside of his foot. James, who was waiting for just such an opportunity, settled himself, cocked his favoured left boot and, concentrating on keeping the ball on the carpet, struck true. The shot didn’t do as he or Cocky, who was shouting instructions from the sideline, wished but did find the top right corner of the opposition’s goal. 2 zip. That’s the way it stayed until half time.
The third goal was a thing of pure beauty. The blues had a pussy shot at goal. Our goalie chested it down and ran – ran the lines like a fool, and almost made it to the opposition’s little circle. The soft blue goalie came out to stop me, but I feigned to the right and slipped a pass out to Tao (who was wearing a trench coat with a red carnation), who just walked it in. 3 zip.
The Nans, who went to the break in the ascendancy, rode their luck it’s true but chance is made by true grit and, last night, the inspirational sight of Chas, the fittest Nanna ever, in full flight, ducking and weaving passed opposition players. It has to be said that Christopher was also very unlucky not to have a couple by the end of the first stanza.
Although Tommy, with his leg newly wrapped in green anti-moisture material, delivered several pearls of wisdom at half time, the second half started with the opposition pegging a goal back, through a combination of Nanna confusion in D and a fortunate bounce of the ball off Gill. 3-1.
Mid way through the second stanza, the game was put beyond doubt as James ran into space and received a long throw from Gill. Taking it down on his chest, and again putting it into the path of his favoured left boot he tried a speculative shot to the opposite corner from where he was turning. Much to his surprise, and maybe with a slight deflection, it found that corner. 4-1.
After that, the game slowed considerably and the Nannas were seen frustrating their opponents. This is where the aforementioned Nannerian grace really came into its own. Andy Wong was the principle proponent of this tactic, wasting no time or energy on trivial matters or hectic schedules. With soothing words for his comrades and an unquenched love of running, he was what you would expect with five minutes to go and the game all but over: a picture of calm confidence inflicting the final blows on an already beaten opponent. Tao, following his lead, was seen congratulating the referee on several calls that went against him, while on the sly tripping up and grabbing at opponents, even though he was in every aspect playing far above any challenger he came up against. Gill, at this point, feigned not knowing where he was and tried to take the ball off the court, like the match was over. He was grabbed unceremoniously by some jerk in blue, who tried unsuccessfully to wrench the ball out of his hands. The opposition knew the jig was up, and although they huffed and puffed, they were never going to better a supreme Nanna outfit, full of Brown pride.
After, an impromptu captain was nominated and a bad speech given. However, the spoils of the coveted APISC second division were delivered to the deserving team.
The mental game has begun
Sure I am this day we are masters of our fate, that the task which has been set before us is not above our strength; that its pangs and toils are not beyond our endurance. As long as we have faith in our own cause and an unconquerable will to win, victory will not be denied us.
061207 team photo
after the glory of the semi final success comes the pain, the realisation that another nanna has been struck down, another ankle goes into rehab, at least this one didn’t need a cast…
Semi-Final 071206
vs Allens FC
6-1
CB 3, DC 1, JH 2
CB, DC, JH, AW, CG, TW, (RH coach)
MOM CB
Oh dear struggling to remember all the details now but here goes..
Our minds were focussed right from the start with some precise strategies from our illustrious Captain who spelt out just what we should be doing, who we should be marking etc.
We took it to them, but also played an excellent defensive game, consistently shutting down their attacks until they started to fall part at the seams and shoot wildly from way out and forget to pass.
We also capitalised on our opportunities making them count at a very high rate.
DC bought one goal with a sprained ankle, our second injury in two weeks after the Howie fibula.
CB got an own goal for the other side which spurred him on to a hattrick to make up for it. But that did mean Allens failed to put one past Gilly at all.
A big match, a big semi-final and now we are set up for a big final with a big tight five with DC in a coaching role. Go Nannas!
Ya, Das Ist Der Coachleggen – Fibulatoasten
He paid the ultimate sacrifice, he gave all that he had to give, he laid down that he may walk so his brother nannas could continue the fight. Sometimes a man has to give up everything, to gain nothing at all.
This is my leg in the slightly shabby plaster cast that the kojaks in emergency put on.
Now check out this sonbitch, it’s your hybrid plaster/fibreglass puppy installed by the trueschool plaster techs at the St Vincents fracture clinic. Yes sir it is lighter, stronger, better fitting and tougher looking… hell even the photo composed itself better in the presence of this beauty. Note the distinct lack of plaster skank on the toes and upper shin when the job is done right. Note also the ‘closer to right angle’ relationship between the foot and the leg in the second cast.
Alright, enough poorly interpreted medical knowledge. Tonight seek not revenge for your smoten coach, seek victory in the pureness of the belief that only the nannas will prevail.
Timid souls be damned.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes short again and again, who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause, who at best knows achievement and who at the worst if he fails at least fails while daring greatly so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.
The source of confidence and unerring Nanna glory
Confidence thrives on honesty, on honor, on the sacredness of obligations, on faithful protection and on unselfish performance. Without them it cannot live.
Match Report 061109
location: Wesley | nannas: TW, DC, AW, JH, CB, CG, TH | opposition: Foregone Conclusion
score: 6-4 | goals: DC 1, CB 2, AW 1, JH 2 | mom: CB + CG
A tight Nannas ensemble of 7 dismantled Foregone Conclusion in a hard fought victory last night at Wesley.
DC and TW hustled hard at both ends of the court and put through a couple of delectable touches forward into space for CB to run onto.
TH gave 110 per cent with some excellent defensive play.
JH slammed home a couple of scorching strikes.
AW got up for some slippery backdoor action and tackled well.
CB got a couple of better than average goals.
CG “the animated chastity belt” raised the goalkeeping bar again with a double pronged penalty resistance followed by a some classic victory postures.
Nice!
At least let us be eloquent
You can’t run a team without profanity; and it has to be eloquent profanity. An team without profanity couldn’t fight its way out of a piss-soaked paper bag.
match report 091106
It was TIGHT and thats how the nannas like it!!!! Tempers were freyed, refs were abused, indians were bumped and victory was signalled!!!!
SCORELINE 6 – 4
MOM – 2 CHris’ – Brown and Gill
Goals were shared, not hoarded, the nannas were a team of MEN. THe crazed nature of the game leaves details blured, suffice to say that we WON.
Details to emerge post game are VERY interesting. Manic promises were made by a lanky memeber of the nannas – who will remain nameless, but his name does rhyme with Bim – that he will purchase an inhaling device known as “the vapouriser” Things we do for our friends….
Also there was one more thing….maybe someone else can remember it….I must have been too “tired” again.
Let us win the victory over ourselves
In reading the lives of great men, I found that the first victory they won was over themselves… self-discipline with all of them came first.
match report 061102
match report coming soon… but for now check the nanna-vision on Jim and Daniel (the coach has theory for this… something to do with sins against god)
This week’s quote is for the sake of that most sacred thing- Nanna manhood
All men are timid on entering any fight. Whether it is their first or the last fight, all of us are timid. Cowards are those who let their timidity get the better of their manhood.
Match Report 261006
Score 13-2
Goals: 5 for Tao, 3 for Captain, 2 for Cocky, 2 for Jim, 1 for chas
MOM: JH
Team: DC, TH, CB, RH, TW, TK, JH
Opposition: Allens FC
If the Nannas can exhibit the form they showed in the second half of their game against Allens FC last night-even if they played against only 4, most agree they will be serious title contenders come end of season.
The first half however, does pose some serious questions for the coach and upper Nanna management. The most notable problem the Nannas face being their lack of discipline toward each other. One player in the first half was seen constantly shouting at his team-mates only to get the shake of the head from Striker (a serious rebuke) and a smart dressing down from Deep Chasm. Although the CODE of the Nannas was introduced (only last week) to stamp out this unruly on court banter it seems some in the Brown outfit are still yet to learn the benefits of encouragement instead of negativity when playing team sports.
The first half saw a stuttering Nanna outfit coming to grips with hectares of space due to the opposition missing a player. Over the past months the Nannas have been tinkering with a new system, whereby their defence try to dominate possession, passing the ball around and waiting for an opening . At times in the first half this strategy worked but also, due to internal communication that can best be described as hostile, the Nanna shape broke down and the brown outfit became frustrated, mainly with themselves. Half time score 4-1, in favour of the Nannas.
Half time and the Captain said some words, which no one dared repeat later for fear of the his wrath. Whatever was said though worked, as the Nannas held their shape and the ball, pinging in nine goals and conceding only one. Although the opposition was broken within minutes of the returning to court in the second stanza, and most who watched from the sidelines agreed the contest was little more than a training run for the men in brown, the execution and willingness of the Nannas to hold the ball and make the opposition live off scraps was a sight to behold.
Special mention must go to striker for his tireless and unselfish work as a lone hand up front. Having bagged his quota for the night he was willing to station himself as far forward as possible giving time, space and options to those behind him.
Special mention also goes to Chasm for his admirable patience with men who are, prima facie, far beneath him.
Takeshi, the Nanna Japanese import, who has a freakishly low centre of gravity also deserves mention. At the beginning of the match Takeshi’s handling skills seemed a bit below his usual high standards. Realising he was having an off night, he was subsequently seen throwing his body in all manner of directions to compensate. His sliding on his knees to save low shots from the opposition was a particular feature.
Tao and Rhian also had solid games. The former showing his dexterity, put five past the opposing goalie, comfortable with either foot. The latter, well, he continues to go at the opposition and hit them where it really hurts although his trickery did at one point see him almost pulled from court. Late in the second period after a restart the Captain tried something that only he would attempt. The opposition took a speculative shot from halfway and Rhian stuck out a backheal and thought he had it covered. Well, it went through his legs faster than Paul Robinson could say, “oh shit”, and Kondo had no chance. The coach was heard to scream from the side line, “Get that fucking idiot off, get him off now!” but was pulled back by a concerned supporter.
This week’s quote makes clear the importance of gaining and keeping the initiative
Carry the battle to them. Don’t let them bring it to you. Put them on the defensive and don’t ever apologise for anything.
match report 061019
score: 2-3 | goals: DC 2 | mom: DC
loc: Wesley | team: RH, DC, TK, CB, AW | opp: Forgone Conclusion
A great game against worthy opposition which ended somewhat disappointingly for a Nanna outfit which showed spirit and teamwork if not the height of their skills.
The C.O.D.E was seen to have an immediate effect with Nanna cohesion extremely tight from the outset. Positional play wasn’t as good as it should have been but the defensive work-rate was highly impressive. Forgone Conclusion were a tight unit with some fine skills and were unlucky not to open the scoring but the nannas were playing like a well oiled machine (minus some of the passing accuracy). At half time the score was 0-0 and the captain had to muster sage advice for the troops between gasps for oxygen. The second half started appallingly with all the nannas save Tom basically resigned to a goal being scored following a run from the kickoff, 3 nannas stopped to watch and almost began to walk back to the centre. Luckily the final shot lacked pace and the nannas picked up their game following the let off. There were some nice one twos and few chances with the head, the captain putting a couple of long range efforts in the right direction. The deadlock was finally broken with some great service from Takesh and nice turn from d’Coq. This was added to shortly after with another tight inside finish. The Nans were up 2 goals with a bit of breathing space but the C.O.D.E began to fray at the edges as the opposition niggles became a little less sportsmanly. The running back was getting worse and the captain was seen to stop at about half way and do a bit of spectating. It wasn’t long before FG were queing up for shots on goal as the Nannas side-coaching steadily increased in volume and abusiveness. Eventually FG started scoring and a late chance at the end for Chas could have equalised things but he laid it off to an unsuspecting and off target Coq. Final score was 3-2 which was a disappointing way to finish what was a really tight contest.
photo: Thomas Howie
In light of last night’s loss- let us all take the following to heart.
When you are in any contest, you should work as if there were – to the very last minute – a chance to lose it. This is battle, this is politics, this is anything.
function pics
okay so here are a couple of phots from the function. still working on the vids, need some input from the administrator.
a bunch o thumbnails option, which are easy but small and kinda suck…click to see the full size image, Hinlkey do you know if it is possible to change the automatic thumbnail size, if we can do that we’re laughing… and I really think we need a wider column (does anyone have an 800 pix monitor that we care about ???)
10 proud men and a lazy susan
that ain’t daytona ?
outside prudence just after 3
the gak gimp
o.k so this is the other option, it’s quite a bit more work (and could be counter productive if people don’t actually click on an image to see the bigger one thinking this is as big as it gets). instead of micro thumbnails we use 430px wide images
10 brown men and a lazy susan. Quail, pork hot pot, salt and pepper squid, lots of Flounder and a box of Coopers pale ale. Tom did a fine job of ordering which almost made up for asking Andy if he wanted a teeshirt with ‘tourist’ printed on it, needless to say Wal was unimpressed. Hugh took the prize for being loudest and first to be threatened with “we’ll call your mum”, though chas later won the prize for first drink spilt on self. Tao takes the prize for being in three photos, Hinkley for looking the most trashed.
10 Brown Men outside Prudence after a night of poker and toilet seat good times. D’Coq managed to not lose all his money but did lose his jacket. Chas had to have a little lie down midway through taking everyones money (except Peter who came in for one hand and made off with $20), Controversy of the night belonged solely to Mssr Howie a) inviting a woman who was not a stripper to the nannas poker function? b) failing to punish a misdeal (when I had 2 aces you $%#^) c) declaring that suits don’t count ? and pots are split ? d) shafting Kondo when he had a flush.
Thanks: to Peter for letting a bunch of bums on the nose buffet muscle decent fee paying customers off the big table and generally rearrange the place to suit their needs: Kudos also to Chris Gill who won the Nannas Medal of Diplomacy (and Takesh for funding said diplomatic mission)
Match Report
Ok guys here is a little breakdown of what happened last week. I kicked 3 goals, chas kicked 4 and someone else kicked 1, I think it was Hinkley. But the only thing that kept us from losing was the skill and finesse of the very talented Chris Gill. After getting off to a brilliant first half the second half was classic Nanna’s fading away into the distance. Even with 3 subs on the side line we seemed to not be able to keep running. Very lucky Nanna’s I say. Time to start jogging in the mornings Nanna’s, have to build up the stamina.
That’s it from me. Good luck this week boys as I won’t be there to yell at you.
Words to play soccer by.
Losers always talk about how they tried their best. Winners don’t need to talk, they just go home and screw the Prom Queen.
061008 team photo
This week’s quote -to all the Nanna WMC-ers (and Tao especially) from Georgie Jnr
I don’t want to get any messages saying, “I am holding my position.”
We are not holding a Goddamned thing. Let the enemy do that. We are advancing constantly and we are not interested in holding onto anything, except the enemy’s balls. We are going to twist his balls and kick the living shit out of him all of the time.
Our basic plan is to advance and to keep on advancing regardless of whether we have to go over, under, or through the enemy. We are going to go through him like crap through a goose; like shit through a tin horn!
Match Report 060928
location: Wesley | nannas: RH, DC, TK, JH, CB, CG, TH | opposition: tbc
score: 9-2 | goals: DC 3, CB 2, RH 2?, TH 1?, JH 1? | mom: CB
A sloppy start against a skilful opposition.
Nannas pulled themselves together with good positional play encouraged by some firm side-coaching. Good passing and team play coupled with excellent scoring meant the Mighty Fighting Nannas came out way on top. I can’t fault us.
Highlight: Left-footed cross from the MOM to the Captain’s laser guided shoulder nut punched the ball home in marvellous style.
Provocolight: A self-proclaimed “not angry at all” Thomas Howie pressed his chest and armpits forcefully on another man while waving his hands in the air and singing and dancing like Britney Spears on man-hormones. One to rival TW’s infamous lunchgrope.