All posts by striker

match report – 23rd Oct, 2014

A long time a go in a galaxy far far away. The Nanna’s came head to head against a deadly force. It was a clash of good and evil, a fight to the death. It was a long and ferocious battle, bloody and sweaty. The Nanna’s were losing the battle, getting pummelled, but the did not give up. The come back started when Daniel Crooks, one of the five Jedi’s leapt ten meters into the air coming down behind the enemy and slew one of the four sith. We kept fighting and noticed that they were getting tired, but we were too. We kept pressing, then Tao saw an opening and went for the kill, but we were still losing the fight. I was in heavy combat with an enemy and was about to take a hit but Andy bravely jumped in front of me and got a nasty cut to his side. In the end, when we couldn’t take another step the sith fled. And the system was rid of 2 powerful sith. 


But I have a feeling that we will meet again. 

Match Report by Elliot Crooks


(ed: youngest Nanna debut at 13 years and 174 days)

Match Report 20th Feb 2014

7-8 v No Snow White – 9.20pm Coburg
DC(3), CG(gk,1), RH, TH,TK, AW, TW (nb: other goal credits still to be confirmed)

Old King lion is king of the jungle. He lives there, in the jungle, with all the other animals that he is the king of and all the plants and trees and insects and all the other shit that lives in the teeming jungle. But in the wastelands, where there is nothing, nothing but ice and sleet and sharp rocks and more ice, there lives another animal, forgotten and lost, wandering for months in the arctic winter. Sad and desperate, in a kind of amnesiac post traumatic fugue state the lone wolf traverses the polar wilderness in search of that which he has unremembered…

And then one day everything changes. The fugue state lifts, memories of the savannah come flooding back in a synaesthetic deluge, an avalanche of meaning and substance. Inundated with purpose, density, mass, weight, shape and structure the lone wolf begins his journey back. With each degree of latitude comes new awareness, a steadily increasing sense of collectivism and self organising complexity. Like a kind of highly evolved slime mould his very cells begin to realign and transmogrify, shifting and changing. As the mighty equatorial plains of Africa unfurl before him he finds he is no longer the lone wolf, lost in the wastelands of the north, but part of a greater whole, a unified system of the world.

He is once again a part of old King Lion. He is home.

God is real…

I must have missed the meeting where the Nannas™ voted to discontinue Match Reports™ or Team Photos™. So in lieu of real content I will post an image of near perfection. Fresh, squeaky, knee high powder! Skiing this stuff requires either great technique or brute force, neither of which I had at my disposal. As a result I was almost incapable of climbing the stairs onto the train back to Linz and now have grave fears for the state of my mobility tomorrow… but what a day, what a sweet sweet day !

the upgrade


The original Geekbench score with 2 x quad-core 2.26 GHz

a pair of X5680s secondhand off ebay


cleaning stuff, thermal bits and a long 3mm hex driver


Processor board comes out


heatsink comes off leaving some goo behind


nice shiny heatsink


fan connector clipped


thermal pad attached to voltage regulators


shiny new CPU leaves the cosy safety of it’s anti-static bag


and gets smeared with thermal paste


and then placed in motherboard


the tricky bit is tightening the screws on the heatsink but it all went very smoothly and now there are 2 x hex-core 3.3Ghz chips…


which are TWICE as fast… happy days.

Match report – August 8th 2013

The Triumph


fly, unloved losing streak, till thou run out thy race;
Call instead upon the lazy leaden-stepping one hit wonders,
Whose speed is but the heavy plummet’s pace;
And glut thyself with what thy womb devours,
Which is no more then what is false and vain,
And merely mortal dross;
So little is their paltry loss,
So mighty a victory is our gain.
As when the single carriage bestrode the path;
Quintuplicate solidus gather’d within prodigous girth.
For when, as each bad pass and miskick hast entomb’d
And last of all thy greedy self consumed,
When injuries steer us not from thy truest quest,
And rightous Shots on Goal thus manifest.
Then long eternal winning shall greet our bliss,
With the ardent seven fold kiss;
And Joy shall overtake us, as a flood,
When every thing that is sincerely good,
And perfectly divine,
With speed, and pace, and possession, shall ever shine,
About the supreme brown throne
Of those, to whose happy-making sight, alone,
When once our golden-gilded soul shall climb,
Then all this earthly grossness quit,
Attired with stars of brown and gold, we shall for ever sit,
Triumphing over our vanquished foes, and thee, O losing streak!




Match Report – 9 May 2013 – part the second

The coach, in his inimitable metonymical style, has pretty much covered all the leonine bases, which leaves me only to ruminate on the twisted ankle I received during the game. It was one of those 50/50 balls where both combatants are connecting at pretty much the same instant. If it were an exercise in 5th form physics the be-leather-patched teacher would explain to his young and restless  students how the equal and opposing forces cancel each other out resulting in an energy transfer from kinetic to heat or light energy. Unfortunately for the author this was not the case, instead the younger, angrier, stokier side of the equation got more on it and the more elegant and subtly placed side of the equation got hideously twisted beyond the normal operational envelope… to be continued… maybe.

First published on: Jun 6, 2013 @ 19:17 – backdated for your viewing pleasure

Match Report – 18th April 2013 : supplemental

Tao did a fine job of covering the match proper and, given as he wasn’t able to attend the ‘aprés’, I shall offer instead a report on the after-match festivities.

So, newly ensconced in the deep north the nannas have been forced into a re-think of the post match venue. It had been rumoured that Preston is veritably teeming with hipster bars so we set out to find one … and find one we did. The Racoon club left me with three enduring images. The First, taxidermy, the stuffed racoon is the new wooden owl. The second, a pretend lumber jack working on his full sleeve tat designs, you know, the bearded, buddy holly bespectacled, flannel shirt wearing guy hunched hunched over a sheet of tracing paper earnestly working on the shading of his pseudo japanese gangster dragon scales… The last and most comical, is the more effete version of the faux-jack, whispy beard and sailors beanie on top of overtly miscombined patterns swirling a ridiculously large brandy glass … hilarious. The captain was experiencing an acute case of hipsteritis and muttering into his order-of-magnitude-more-hetreo-and-manly whiskers… needless to say we were back the following week ordering the finest Islay single malts* and locally brewed small batch IPAs…

* Ardberg, not as medicinal as Laphroig but with all the smoke and peat

First published on: Jun 6, 2013 @ 19:04 – backdated for your chronologically ordered viewing pleasure

Match Report • March 21st 2013

4-7 v Real Madredful – 6pm Wesley
CB, DC(3,mom), GF(1), CG, RH, TW – supporters OTG, PTG, SB

All the talk was of Preston this week. From my perspective it was all to do with an ill fated house purchasing scenario just south of Bell St, what a freakin’ nightmare. From the Captain’s perspective it was all about Hoddle Street/Punt Road and how we might avoid the weekly monoxide nightmare it has come to represent. Apparently they have spare places in a Preston comp on a Thursday … we’ll see. I for one am up for it but I do harbour grave fears for the structural integrity of the Nannas™ if we were to attempt a move. Morale is low, commitment is lower, the thursday night impromptu has not been see in the wild for a very, very  long time. A move at this point could prove disastrous.  On the other hand it could be just what the brown brothers need to kick start that old  joie de vivre that is so sorely missing… perhaps we should put it to the voter®… or a forum poll perhaps.

The 6 o’clock game is fucker, or if you are the coach, a fister. It played absolute havoc with our transportation ( more grist for the preston mill). I met Giller and the Captain oustide Clifton hill station ( is that a first ? a pickup from PT ?) after a frisk and wriggle with the met police.  We made better than expected time on boulevard of evil and arived… wait for it… 32 mins… that’s right…32 mins early, which was odd. Visitor© and Brown© arrived a little closer to kickoff but no sign of teh Nannas whose names stat with “Ta” so it was a Tight 5 for the first half until Bestlooking© managed to fight his way through the traffic, making us 6 for the second half. Cheezles opened the scoring with a deftly placed shot which was followed quickly by one from the author (a rather novel event) putting the brown and gold 2 ahead after about 5 mins. By half time it was 2 all and 4-7 at the final whistle. We played pretty well for the most part with some good passing, nice running and a great goal at the end (if I do say so myself) but they were killing us on the counter and had a couple of footskills too many. ah well.

The standard post 6 o’clock game full impromptu failed to materialise due to total nanna nannalyness leaving giller and the author to go to Huxtaburger for a mandate ( and full props to huxtaburger fro remembering the forgotten burger), followed by a brief tour of smith street’s artistic output, we were even planning to have a look at Alice’s opening… dirty… but then the tram arrived, so the author didn’t get to… but giller did.

– – – – – – – – –

Preston #1, the one that got away…


Preston #2, the harsh graphic reality…

Match Report 31.1.13

1-2 v Hamptons

DC(m), CB, RH, GF, JH(1), TK, TW, AW

Holy crapsticles, what a day. What a freakin’ week !

Thursday the 31st of January 2013 as pointed out by the Visitor™ has rather a nice symmetry to it. Not only that but it has a deep significance for the author as it was on this day that he marked his 40th complete revolution of the sun. That’s right, 31.1.13 was a big day.

For the Match Report™ I was planning to do something of a comic book photo essay detailing the activities of the day from rise to crash but after starting it all seems a bit too much given Wal is picking me up in less than two hours.

After a brief sleep in I got out of bed, opened cards from the young children and received apologies for lack of present from the wife. Breakfast involved lovely (very pink) company and great coffee but a rather shit breakfast. I definitely don’t recommend the bacon, fig and onion chutney from penny farthing at all, more than a slight suggestion of mince on toast from the Tokaora tea rooms !

Lunch, now this is where it started to get good. I brief whip into the studio was followed by PT into the city to meet up with the Captain and Brown at Gills Diner. After some rather delicious local beers (it’s the year of the IPA according to the Captain) and a round of coffin bay oysters ( and discussion about excessive decorative rock salt use) I had the porterhouse (grass fed) with triple cooked chips and heirloom carrots. My colleagues had the free range pork coteletta with Italian coleslaw. I felt slightly guilty getting the steak as it seemed a bit bland, you know how restaurants always seem to have a nice safe steak with straight up veges for the Dad to get ‘cos he doesn’t like that fancy shit. Any way after some discussion with the waitress about ‘very rare’ v ‘blue’ I ordered rare… of course it came out medium (idiots) but i didn’t have the heart to send it back, and it did taste fantastic… as did the fig salad and the continued IPA drinking.

Leaving Gills, we went in search of bar. Unfortunately our groovy new secret underground back alley bar knowledge has accrued about 15 years of rust so went to the rooftop bar. Points in it’s favour: the view – Points against: No shots ??? and a group of flouro-vested-middle-aged-tourists gawping at the jobless patrons. Ah well, the sun was out and Chassy spilled a $16 margarita while talking us through it’s purchase. We were quite tipsy by this point and the concern was mounting on the forum.

From curtain house we jumped on a tram with the notion of having enough time to squeeze in one more drink. No sooner were we on the tram than the heavens opened up with ‘red on the weather radar’ level tropical downpour. There was much laughter and Photostream™ commenting as we trundled down St Kilda Rd. A crazed dash through the rain had us in the Belgian beer cafe sipping on Patron and noting the whiskey like flavours of a high quality tequila.

And then to the game. There was much mockery and laughter but the 3 of us were pumped, except that i had no kit due to a family stuck in traffic north of the river. That’s where the brotherhood of the Nannas really comes into it’s own, from nowhere came a pair of shorts and a top. No Caoch (due to his new role as a Land Lord) meant no sub sheet. Having so badly fvcked up the last one i was determined, even through my patron haze, to get this right, and I did, but forgot how it worked before running on. Subbing chaos ensued including 2 re-drawings (in one of which the Captain wholly omitted Wal from the lineup) but no matter as we were one up thanks to Jim. I’ll admit, the game is somthing of a blur, but we were doing OK. There was some nice passing and some nice running, but it was freaking hot, three of the on court players and been drinking since 1pm and our defence began to fall apart. I had a couple of runs on goal which could have ended better, Brown could have converted his penalty, we could all of had some slightly better finishing. In the end it was somewhat deflating draw. but no, not only had we veered off script when i didn’t score the winner in the dying seconds, in fact we had lost ! WTF ? In any case the Nannas were magnanimous in the extreme, awarding the birthday fool the MOM.

Saying goodbye to the entirely selfless Miri (who had driven 3 children through peak hour traffic to watch their foolish father’s fortieth football fumblings) we headed to the Waiters. The captain and Brown had lost a little of their pre-game pizzaz but the Author was determined to keep the good times alive so gratefully accepted a peroni while contemplating another plate of red meat. Everything pointed to the sardines, but there weren’t any on the specials board. Te fall back would of course be the Porthouse with pepper sauce but I’d already had one of those only a few hours earlier so I opted for the Fillet Mignon. To be honest it was pretty rustic following Gills but that’s the joy of the waiters right. It should also be noted that the Funky Nanna had by this time joined the party. Bestlooking threw Osso Bucco all over himself and then it was time to find a bar. But not of course before a partaking of mildly discombobulating reliefer downstairs from Waiters. Suitably bewildered we headed into the city. Giller, unlike relier in the day, knew where we should go and soon the nannas were ensconced in a hipster bar looking only mildly out of place. The bar man somehow convinced the Visitor and I that some kind of fancy Jose Cuervo was actually better than Patron (idiot) so it was that and some beer I can’t remember. Brassy also came to the party at this point with some of the black magic of which Brassy is so fond.

And then at last, the highlight of the evening, Daytona. Not only did i not fuck up and find myself solo racing (and yelling at the staff) as usual (though both Brown and the Captain did somehow manage this act (I’ll admit there was the tiniest touch of schadenfreude)) but we even worked out how to buy-in after the race has started… Ahhhh sweet car racing games, they really are a disproportionate amount of fun.

From here, we started to lose people. Like 2 giant solid-fuel booster rockets Brown and the Captain peeled off, returning spent to earth as their precious payload continued it’s stratospheric journey into the night. Bestlooking also left for much more pragmatic reasons. Nam Loong provided some questionably hygienic pork buns before we went to troika for a quiet one, a beer I believe, more Peronis perhaps. The Visitor™ recorded some candid camera video with his highly prominent new iPad Mini before himself disappearing into the evening shortly after midnight leaving Thefunkynanna, Wal and I to ponder dessert.

John Saffran wasn’t there and we didn’t get the big plush leather seats beside the Return of the Jedi™ window but jesus christ, the supper club really payed the dessert bills. Crème brûlée, sticky date pudding and a lemon tart. All washed down with a glass of Pedro Ximénez (interestingly, the only one on the menu (and completely unknown by our waiter (idiot))). boom. unfortunately i did at one point inhale some of the PX which was a really bad thing to do, for a long moment i thought i was either going to throw up or pass out or both.

By the time we caught the cab home, I was so fucking full I had a little shelf just below my sternum, not a Robert Crumb fantasy butt shelf you could rest a cup of tea on, more like a rest your 0.2mm pilot fineliner shelf.

I finally crawled into bed about 1.30am irritating Miri with the led light on my phone as I tried to finish off my “a man turns 40” video diary… holy crapsticles, you only turn 40 once right !


* illustrations to follow

Match Report 10th of January 2013

4-10* v South Melbourne AMC
DC(4,m), GF, RH, TH


That is the mantle that sits proudly upon the shoulders of 4 of the finest Nannas to ever wear the brown and gold. Twas the first game of the New Year and most nobly did they enter the battle a full man short of a team. That is not to say that Gilla is a full man but it is to say that he deserted his brothers when they needed him most. Admittedly it was the 10th birthday of Northside and there was a veritable ocean of pert young ladies dashing their nubility upon the white cliffs of the proprietors eyeballs… but… no, we were pretty sure as we drove off without him that we were alone… so alone. Yes, we could have hired some sellsword to step into the breach, but locating the number of single futsal mercenary was beyond us so early in the year. I for one had been in the country less than 24 hours. And thus it was that we rode onto the field with Bish* the ref  as our goalie (will we ever learn?, the ref never goes in goals !). Our opponents, saxons amongst them, were far from the stiffest, ahem, we have come, ahem, up against and the nannas were well matched to the task. Alas the second half came around, the nannas ran out of juice and Bish stopped stopping the ball going in the net. It was unattractive.

After the game we went back to an empty house in north fitzroy (apart from the chickens) ate malaysian, drank beer, chatted with brassy, drank Oban and generally got pretty trashed. We were joined by Wal with a slab of beer direct from Croajingalong. Near the end of the evening Frasay took the opportunity to outline his ambitions for the Captain and I to star in a high intensity martial arts action film which we promptly began rehearsing.

* actual score was 4-14
** Not sure exactly what the refs name is

GoPro – a love story

It’s funny. I dropped my Hero 2 in the sea just out from the beach at Staffa Bay (East Coast, NZ (-35.561880, 174.495158)). It pretty much disappeared immediately (I was upside down skirted into a kayak so couldn’t really search for it that effectively) but at the time I really wasn’t that fussed. I’d kind of fallen out of love with the camera, the same camera that had paradigmally changed my view of what a camera is just a year before. I think it was the internal fogging (and maybe the boys’ nikons) that had taken the shine off. Maybe it was the fact that the newer Hero 3 had recently been released, or perhaps it was simply that the sun hadn’t really been shining much on the holiday. What ever it was I hardly even blinked when it left me to take videos with Tangaroa (I do love the idea that is was recording at the time and some diver will find it in 10 years with 4 hours of crazed seafloor action footage still on the SD card). Cut to a few days later, the sun comes out and I’m killing myself. I spent half a day in Whangarei trying to find a replacement (and a full-suit rashy for a semi-burnt Billie) to no avail – stinkin’ Whanagrei. Then spent the rest of the holiday growing increasingly agitated due to lack of waterproof camera action (as I was too stupid to remember that both boys had such things… idiot !). Anyway back in Melbourne I discover they are virtually impossible to get hold of due to massive worldwide over demand… thank goodness for the local suburban surfshop – one left, thank you.

720p at 120 fps
2.7k at 24fps
log curve recording at high bitrates
wifi remote


Match Report 121115 – part the 2nd

Jim has pretty much said it all, well I’m assuming he has because his post looked really long (though I haven’t actually read it). So instead I have spent my time uploading a few old team photos… nothing special, but for the record – innit.

The Visitor Lights the Captains Fart
Old King Lion as backdrop
BPDP against the boards

But what is kind of special is the Nannas Ornaments font, a set of ornament glyphs (or dingbats if you prefer) based on the Nannas iconography. It’s not quite ready for public release but here’s a sneak peak (click image for the Character Map)… boom.


– – –


match report 19 July 2012

7-3 ? v French Vikings ?

DC4m •, JH3 • CGgk • TW • CB • GF • RH


The Captain’s return and another resounding win for the nannas. The early game was a forfeit so we ended up playing the same team as last week. Originally thought to be of Scandinavian extraction, what with their long blonde trusses, turns out they were in fact francophones.

Anyway, it was pretty much business as usual. Jim slammed in two of his now trademark corner shots, one from each end of the court this time. These were added to by another fro Jims second hat-trick in a row. Le Coq sportif had to go one better than last week and put in 4 with notable assists from BestLooking (especially the last one, textbook, I think it was 5 passes , starting with Giller in goal, cross court twice, then a final cross super tight and low from Tao… tap in.) I also have to mention the corner, I was kind of hiding in the shadows by the wall completely unmarked, some nice decoy running from the nannas in the circle and then jim laid it off into so much space i could run right round the ball and shoot with the right… nice. It should also be mentioned that they also had a ring in who was having a bad day in goal, at one point he rolled the ball out straight to a waiting nanna who kicked it straight back into the goal. nice.

P&O Gill were supporting and dinner was cancelled due to a few factors but a handful of Nannas (well a hand with only 4 fingers) went to UAE and drank  pomegranate juice and ate lamb. We were meant to listen to the captains stories from his European coach ride but The 4 hour mark had passed an as everyone knows the international rule of listening to travel stories is only 25mins, so we instead talked of things local and trival ( and software), luckily I had heard a few from Tessa earlier.

datestamp: Tapatalk is a piece of junk • Retina display will take 4 weeks to deliver • CS6 is killing it • London Olympics open in a week *yawn* • More talk of Rudd ousting Gillard *yarn* • ASG commission goes up to 50% *gulp* • Cheezles begins watching blocking vids • TheFunkyNanna becomes a label mogul (this is old, but news to the author) • dude dressed as batman goes postal in a US cinema during a midnight screening of  Nolans #3, Christan Ble flies in to console victims •

Match report 12 July 2012

Another mighty win for the nanna A team, 6-3, two hat-tricks, some nice passing, jim obeying the golden rule and hitting them real sweet, giller making very upper nanagement like sounds at the halftime pep talk, some tired legs in the second half, a new ref, a vist from Phil and to top it off a go-pro time lapse to document it all… Yay

Match report part II –

3-4 v Pornstars

GF (2 MOM), DC (MOM), TK (MOM), CG, JH (1),TH, AW

there’s not a lot I need to add to the visitors report (apart from how much it sucked to lose to these guys) so I’ll just add some date stamps.

the big news is the discovery of an elementary particle that would bear all the hallmarks of the Higgs Boson. I’ve tried wrapping my head around the numbers a few times with absolutely no success but there is a cool little animated ‘for dummies’ guide which i’ll try and fine the link for. | erm, what else. The 70-200 finally arrived and partially alleviated my buyers regret | The forum is in the doldrums | teh captain has returned from his carriage ride around ausrto-hungary | Chaspergers has headed to the old country with his son and heir | bestLooking took eldest daughter skiing for the first time, boom | The visitor got high mid portrait and then disappeared into a neutral vortex | It’s really freaking cold

match report 21 Jun 2012

3-1 v Th aHampton street Phase Wannabes
DC 2m, GF, CG gk, JH 1, TK

Ok, thank god the planets are back in alignment and I get to write a match report about winning… it was the Nanna A team… what else was going to happen. In fact it turned out to be quite a comfortable win for the super tight 5 Nanna A, quite in contrast to the last second arrival of the emasculator.

The tight 5 is the shcnizzle, especially against a team of phase wannabes who were lacking their regular goalie and really didn’t seem up for it. There was a bit of the usual argey bargey but nothing excessive, perhaps the fact that BestLooking wasn’t playing had something to do with it? The Nannas were stringing passes together and the first 2 goals fcame rom nice build up play including a couple of long cross-court passes. Both Kondo and Cheezles had clear opportunities and Jim powered 1 in from a free kick at close range. It was also good to welcome back Giller, fresh from high fiving Marion Goodman in Kassel and looking very large in goals. And finally to finish off, a mathematically elegant triangular MOM vote – 1, 2, 3, 4 and a super tight 5 for le coq sportif.

Should also mention the support – 3 young nannies, Otis, Poppy and Elliot.

Dinner was postponed due to said supporters and public transport issues.

date stamp:
Spain beat Portugal on penalties to progress to the final | the 70-200 ƒ2.8 II finally arrived with a dented box, a cloud of doubt and possible purchase regret | The Nannas have their first official apple developer… look out for the MOM voter in the itunes store any day now | Poker this saturday, there’s some big talk so let’s so who does they walking…

match report 14 June 2012

2-6 v Red Peppers
CB ass, DC 1 mom, GF, JH 1, TK, TW

In a strange turn of events I’m writing a match report after a game we didn’t win, so there goes that opening line, but we could have won it.

The Nannas™ started brightly with some nice ball holding and movement around the court. The Red Peppers (apprently – but they looked just like St Kilda, the opposition from the last grand final (that we were in)) are a very skilled team, in truth a couple of orders of magnitude above the Nannas™, but we were well and truly holding our own. They got the first but we pulled level with an acrobatic lob from the author. Turns out jimbob was putting in a lofted pass to Andy in the far left corner but I jumped like a gazelle, poached it from mid air and somehow guided it into the top right corner of the net. The Opposition got another just before half time but the Nannas were in a fighting spirit. The Ass coach was doing a fine turn as the inspirational coach and we led into the second half full of ambition. A wee way in we were level through the powerful left foot of big Jim. It was looking good, then something happened and … what for it… the nannies folded ? yes indeed. I’m not quite sure what happened, we were still playing pretty well but they just keep putting them in the net, Kondo was left on his own at the back a few too many times but even so, it was odd. ah well.

after the game we went to Korea, no one was eating, well maybe a little snack, well actually maybe a full meal of bbq meaty good times. dang that shit is super fine…

date stamp: talk of Japan 13 is on the table – Tao is also talking Mt Hotham but there is currently no snow – Hamiltonian Paths are the shit – the 70-200 II still hasn’t arrived – smoke detectors are threatening to confound the poker night

match report – 31 May 2012

10-6 v The Legacy – Wesley
CB2, DC6m, GF, JHgk, RH, TW1, AW1

A mighty victory for the Nannas™.

It seems I start all my match reports theses days with “it’s been a long time between wins for the Nannas” and again this is how I should start. The old men of nanna, OMON, have been on a bit of losing streak but that streak came to an abrupt halt this evening. Well, in truth it wasn’t that abrupt. At one point we were 3-5 down and it was pretty easy to see how the game could end 4-7 or the like. But that wouldn’t have been a fair reflection of the Nannas’ efforts. They were, if not on fire, then at least very very warm. Jim was in goals with his new bike gloves, 3 beers and a couple of reefers under his belt. Apparently he had forgotten that the captain usually steps into the 4th string goalie position (and that was even before the pre game festivities). After a few soft goals he pulled it back together and kept a near clean sheet for the second half, not to mention some excellent distribution and not once kicking the ball into the wall at the opposite end of the court. Cheezles Jafrezzi, equally inebriated and thankfully not in goal, did a fair imitation of being on top of the situation before later admitting he was too hammered to see the ball for most of the first half. The author managed the incredibly rare feat of the double hat-trick. The numbers flatter him as their golie was crap and 2 of the 6 were tap-ins from some excellent assist work from Tao and Wal. Chassy was running hard and hade to deal with a number of over enthusiastic challenges (and the chastisement of his brothers) while banging in a couple of sweet shots, the first an instinctive left from an initially saved right… tasteful. The nannas passing game was also well and truly on display, the Captain, the Best Looking Nanna and the Walmartin at the heart of some very pleasing triangles, 1-2s and even some 1-2-3s…

Perhaps it was Jim’s scathing report from last week, possibly the absence of the Coach and The Funky Nanna, maybe the opposition having a really crap goalie, or perhaps merely chance, whatever the reason the sun was out and the Nannas shone! yay.

post match there was some confusion about who was cooking. without the coach to guide us (in fact we had to call him and interrupt hannah’s birthday celebrations) we went to Prudence and listened to Cheezles justify his only-child-like purchasing of pints, ate heavily cheesed and tardily delivered pizza, dicsussed topics of which i have no recollection and left smelling of long since smoked cigarettes…

timestamp: Transit of Venus, Nanna Forum kicks in and the Log Log™ goes viral, Logo V2 nears ratification – new hoodies should be sometime this decade, ARB cuts rates due to grim european economic outlook, Mit Romney nominated as republican candidate, Daenerys Targaryen gets her dragons back, le Coq Numerique orders an 8 bay raid for storing the flood of data from his Epic and also a freakin’ monopod !

match report 120305

5-3 v hyderoos
CB 2 m, DC 1 m, JH 2, GF, CG gk

A mighty win, a mighty freakin’ win !

Man, it has been a really long time between wins for the ageing men in the poos and wees strip. Why has it been so long ? and what was so different on this occasion ? The obvious reason is that Nanna A turned up reversing the recent lack of cohesion due to inconsistent numbers and a near total lack of game fitness. But the TRUE reason is Scrotal Shaving.

shaved; for speed and accuracy


Guy had been talking it up for days on the flurry and there was much discussion in the one-car-drove. Turns out Guy didn’t actually employ a razor, instead using scissors to reduce his ‘bush’ to a 3mm stubble. Now what is most interesting is that chassy, perhaps the most well groomed member (no pun intended) of the nans revealed that he had never partaken in pubic pruning. Imagine his shock andsubsequent intrigue when he learned that the striker had, from time to time, thinned out the manly nether forest. I can’t quite remember the details of Chassy’s questioning but, alarmingly, I do remember the phrase ‘sexual pleasure’ being used. Good God man, do you really want to drive that sort of traffic to the Nannas™ blog ?! Suffice it to say that we all learned a thing or two on that drive, mainly regarding the dimensions of guys bush (or was that only Giller and I later in the evening…?).

"G" for Guy ?

so… the game. Chassy, all fired up on thoughts of bald scrotums punched in a couple of early goals. Frasay (or should that be Shaun ?) was running diametric to the game plan but still managed to find himself in plenty of spaceq with some excellent positional work…get it. Jim, though drunk and high, put in a barn-storming turn; hustling , menacing and even scoring with his head ! Giller didn’t have much to do in the first half but came into effect hard in the second half, particularly near the end when he rolled his impressive girth onto the flimsy toothpick-like leg of the striker, cue hyper extension of the knee joint and the nans down to 4 men. Weathering a late assault with a man down is never easy but the nans acquitted themselves most admirably and ran out deserved winners.

the striker™ taken out by friendly fire

Post match saw Jim dropped at parliament, Chassy dropped at home for an early departure (full kudos for playing) and Giller, Shaun and the author heading to Joes for pizza, beer, blonde and shaun talking bush.

match report 120216

1-0 v ?
CB, DC (1,mom), RH, AW, GF, CG, JH

A Win! A freakin’ win at last. Long has it been since the mighty king lion, vanquisher of mythological and metaphorical beasts, savoured the the sweet, cloying taste of victory. And well done it was too. A good solid 1 goal win, established early and defended righteously until the final whistle. Yes, a good solid win that was both good and solid. Hard edged and smooth, with very little ornamentation or detail, just good, honest and lacking in any overwrought features, characteristics, attributes, aspects, facets, parts, components or elements.

So moving on to other details of import:
• Whitney Houston died and was reincarnate as Susudio Dougdale Whitney Rhonda Coltrane Howthews Mathowie III • Kevin Rudd resigned as Minister of foreign affairs • Le Coq Sportif hired a camera he has already paid for because his still hasn’t arrived after 9 months • Ghee got some new Persols • Arsene Wenger said coming 4th is a trophy in itself after losing 4-0 to Milan in the UCL • Sydney scientists built the world’s tiniest transistor by precisely positioning a single phosphorus atom in a silicon crystal • Le Coq Sportif successfully wrote a setup script quicker than doing the task manually in the first place • Rocket started Kinder • The Hyandai iLoad with a third row of seats became very attractive • Austerity measures are enacted due to massive overspending •

I was going to write more about the nature of self delusion and outcomes versus process but that will have to wait for another time.

“done is the engine of more” – but isn’t that just capitalist thinking ?

Match Report 110922

5-7 v ?, Melbourne Girls’, 9.20pm
CB, DC 4, GF, CG (gk) 1, RH, TH, TK
mom DC

A curious game this one. APISC pulled a late venue change on us with the game shifting to Melbourne Girls College*. A time change also proved an arse for Jim who was forced to get high and catch a train to regional oblivion. Giller on the other hand made the late pull-in, bringing our number to 7. The excitement of the generator bikes in the foyer soon wore off when we realised that there were no spare balls for a warm up, but it was okay for the Reach-around™ as he had worn some tights. A rather soft goal was conceded by the Nannas not long after kickoff but we soon stormed back into the game. Some magical cross court passing lead to the first, followed by a free kick and something of a solo run by the author. Giller was playing some lovely square balls early on but then started to kick them around a little too much for the coach’s liking who, in quite uncustomary form, yelled at the goalie… a lot.. all the way to the side line after the half time whistle blew.. and still kept yelling. Early into the second half we nicked another but were 4-5 down before Giller finally hit the target. the equaliser is always a rejuvenating force but by this stage the nannas were getting tired and the defence was beginning to gape. The man in tights was really starting to sweat, the captain was taking some wild punts, the coach was yelling ‘Fraser’ and pointing a lot, it was heading south fast and we shipped two more before the final whistle… ah well. Unusually, yet luckily for the author, his 4 goal haul was enough to pip Giller by a single vote. Then Chassy of the Triple Crown® took us to some crazy Shanghai genre mashup inspired diner disco in the arse end of Little Collins. Bong Mist was there which made it seem cooler than perhaps it was. We drank beer (except the coach who had tap water (which according to Guy is still technically mineral water)), talked about movies (Guy was there), Rhian gave props to the new museological show at acmi (well actually that was in the car on the drive to Melbourne Girls’), I tried to convince Tom that it is actually spelled reamde and isn’t just a design thing, we ate some chips and calamari and completely forgot to discuss the style guide for the blog, which was annoying.

* it was noted that a nanna progeny may be attending said institution to receive her secondary education